Baby, it’s so good to have you back. To see you back on home turf, on Ugandan soil, in the land where we made you, where we love you, where you can feel safe? That’s feels great. You can eat some katogo and mubisi and hoof and sing in that celestial voice of yours which everyone with satisfactory ears will agree is the most awesome voice since sonic vibrations first entered the stirrup hammer and anvil of human beings.
I know it has been a tough experience for you while you were locked up in Japan for alleged drug trafficking and it can’t have been made easier by the fact that all these haters here were talking all that shit. I hear mbu you have been listening to too much Rick Ross and now you want to start slanging rocks internationally and be fly like a G6.
But me I always knew you were innocent. No, I’m not just saying that the way all these other stans say it. I really really knew you were innocent. It was all just a big misunderstanding.
You see, I told my guy to put the drugs in the luggage of someone called Allan Mubiru. That is our usual guy. But you know Japanese and Ugandans share a weakness when it comes to the letters L and R so the fool heard his own things and put the stuff in the wrong bag.
I am really sorry for the inconvenience. I regret it even more than you would imagine because now that means my drugs are in police custody in Japan. That is a major loss for the business. Nobody regrets it more than me.
Except for a bunch of Japanese drug addicts who really need to get high but their score is in Tokyo PD lock up.
The Kampala Kingpin