In a joint statement with the NRM Secretary General Amama Mbabazi yesterday, Sylvester Stallone, director of the 2010 ensemble action blockbuster ‘The Expendables’, announced that the rebel MPs who were expelled from NRM would join the top-billed cast for the highly anticipated third installment, ‘The Expendables 3’.
The announcement follows a declaration by the Speaker of Parliament, Hon. Rebecca Kadaga that all MPs expelled from a party are, by constitution, mandated to exit in the most kickass way possible. “They can either choose to freestyle to a Dr. Dre beat or publish a very controversial sex tape complete with ninjas and stuff, or, like in this case, do a movie,” she said.
Director Stallone intimated to ULK that he was excited to work with such professionals greatly skilled in the art of being disposable. “One look at them and you know they are built to be kicked out of things,” he said. “It’s what guided us in casting them as this elite outfit of drug addicts sent out to save the kidnapped son of an undisclosed political kingpin. Although, instead of saving the boy, they raped him…oh, I’m giving away the plot. Sorry.”
The expelled MPs Theodore Ssekikubo, Wilfred Niwagaba, Barnabas Tinkasiimire and Muhammad Nsereko are expected to make their acting debut alongside Minister of Ethics & Integrity Simon Lokodo as their drug supplier. It is also rumoured that the movie’s early 2016 release will most likely coincide with President Museveni’s release of the highly anticipated second studio album, “You Want Another Rap Again?”