Las Divas Corporitas: Oh The Immorality

By • May 29th, 2012 • Category: Las Divas Corporitas




There comes a time in every hot young newchick’s life when she has to bend down to pick something off the ground. This may happen when Alphonse is just walking into the room where the thing dropped. Miranda was halfway back up when she heard a voice behind her. A growling sound, like a zombie bajaj emerging from the bottom of a landfill. Only sleazier.


Alphonse: Eh heeeheeeheee.

Miranda: Oh, hello. Um Alphonse, yes? (She straightens up and is now upright, but he is still grinning lecherously)

Alphonse: How are you yes. So eeeeh heeeheeeheee heeeheeeheee. So how are you eeh fitting in eheee heeeheeeheee.

Miranda:I’m… um… adjusting quite well, actually. Dora keeps me very busy so I have had to get to know the place pretty fast. In fact I have these files to deliver to her right now I had better get going. (Hint, hint, hinty-hint-hint).

Alphonse: Eheee heeeheeeheee. So umm are you eeh settled in well eheee heee… (He seems to be drooling out of his eyes as well.)

Miranda: Oh. Ooow kaaaay. I talk a bit fast sometimes, don’t I? (Ka polite little giggle) That’s only when I have A Lot. Of work. To do. I was saying Dora is waiting. For these. Files. I had better get them to her. (Actually starts walking towards the space left in the door.)

Alphonse: (The guman doesn’t move.) Heeeheeeheee if you want to hellep you settle yin eheee you can orreys call me heeeeeeeeeeeh. (This one sounds as if he is trying to laugh. You know those laughs people use when they have said something that isn’t funny but they want it to be so they laugh at the end to make it seem more like a joke?)

Miranda: Health coverage here covers ear infections, doesn’t it?

Alphonse: By the way eeeemmm how do you like taking lunch eh?

Miranda: Orally I guess. (Then regretting using that word. Now looking around for a crowbar to use to dislodge him from the doorway)

Alphonse: I will come and we go for some lunch later. Heeeheeeheee (Now he sounds like those Nigerian chiefs in those movies. If it were not for the unfortunate drawback of him being broke he should be offering her a car right now.)

Miranda: Oh, yeah. Let me just take these files to Dora first yeah? Okay. Good. (Finally sees an opening and dashes out of the door)

Alphonse: eheeeee heeee.



How do you understand this one?


Barbara and Angella in their office area. They are at a computer. Whether working or not who knows.

Miranda: (Bursting in) You have got to hide me!

Barbara: Miranda, this is Angella. Angella, this is the new chick.

Angella: The frape-ninja, right? I am familiar with your work. Your kung fu is strong.

Miranda: You have got to hide me!

Miranda: Alphonse asked me to out to lunch

Angella:That’s weird.

Miranda: I know. He just showed up. He was staring at my butt so hard I could almost feel his eyes kneading into the flesh. I turned around so I was facing him but I could swear he was still staring at my ass.

Angella: No, that’s typical Alphonse. I mean it’s weird that he would ask. Normally he just informs you. Well, Bon Apetit

Barbara: Bring us a doggy bag.

Miranda: What? No! I don’t want to go. To spend an hour with this guy?

Angella: Why not? Go somewhere nice.

Barbara: And bring a doggy bag.

Miranda: No way. That guy has xray vision. I swear it.

Angella:Kale we ate on that guy’s lechery. Pity he threw us out.

Barbara: Yeah. Protea chicken was awesome.

Speak of the devil. Look who walks in.

Alphonse: Hello beaurriful ladies. Eheeeeeee

Miranda: Bye people. I’m off to have some morning sickness. I believe I was recently made pregnant. Bye.

Alphonse: Heeheee.

Liking this article is what happens to cool people

  • Fredahajaro

    Hilarious, in the same shoes as Miranda…