One sunny day at KCCA offices…
Jenny: Today we’re closing everything this city doesn’t need. Pollution?
Staff: Mukwano soap factory be’s rampant.
Jenny: Mr. Lukwago, do you use soap?
Jenny: Okay, close it. Noise from concerts?
Staff: That’s not a problem, madam. The music doesn’t reach people’s houses.
Jenny: But I received complaints from Kololo about that conflict of champions in Kyadondo.
Staff: That was Bobi Wine jeering. He’s normally louder than the speakers.
…And that’s how KCCA banned concerts after 10pm. Those who want to perform beyond 10pm have to end the show, switch off their machines, go home and then they can continue with their concerts.
But for us we don’t care. We have radios at home. It’s the people who are left with very little to do after that time we care about. Which is where we come in. To give solutions where others see none.
To tell Mukwano soap factory to use some of the soap to clean the atmosphere if they want to be reopened. To tell the frustrated opposition MPs to ignore term limits and just remove the terms themselves. Then M7 will rule blanks.
And so we’re here to take away your troubles. Just because there will be no concerts after 10pm doesn’t mean there’s no plot. After 10pm, you can:
Breathe. Breathing is one of the fundamental requirements of life dating as far back as 20 BC when it was first discovered in Rome. It reached Africa much later in the 16th Century when it was imported by colonialists and slave traders.
Read ULK. It’s considered a staple food in many countries in the world because of its rich nutritional composition:
- Wisdom – 1200k/cal
- LOL – 1500g
- Coolness – 2000g
Be there there. This is one of the biggest and most lucrative sports in Uganda. Activities in this sport include tweeting, facebooking, chilling, lousing, arguing about football and even going to the toilet.
Go home and sleep.