A Relapse Into Insanity

By • Feb 1st, 2012 • Category: WTH

 

 

 

According to the famous bone thrower and intestine analyzer, Dr Chyang Ping the Rain Maker. It’s not going to rain anytime soon.

Oi. Who say Chyang lein-maker! Chyang Oloscope writer! Told you fazzand times oleddi.

 

Whatever dude. I don’t care

“Do I detect a smidgen of apathy? Are you giving up on life?” Says the psychiatrist; fondling her clipboard like a deadly weapon.

Sorry lady it’s the heat. It’s affecting my sanity. If you don’t believe me, here is an excerpt from my first draft…

Hot… Hotness… Heat… Pain… Sun in sky… Sweat… Dust and sweat make mud… Can’t think…Too hot… Must drink mud and live…

This went on for several pages. Thanks for those capsules by the way.

down the hatchet the feeling you can't match it

………………………..

It IS really hot, and the rumor that there is a pending water shortage in town is not going to do much for my peace of mind. The heat can make you do crazy things. Heat combined with other kinds of heatness will make you do retarded things. For example a few minutes ago I found myself following a giggling pair of buttocks all the way from Kobil Kamwokya all the way to Kiira road police station. Let me upload one of the pictures.

At least I tried

This heat is ballistic; it will have you going all menstrual because someone has noticed something slightly off about your kakaba and made fun of it.

GASP!! Uh no, he didn’t!!

i pee on rihanna man i do what i wanna

 

But on the real though, dear readers, this is a personal appeal.  Don’t make fun of peoples kakabas. Just this morning someone said vewwy vewwy cwuel about my kakabas and it really hurt my feewings.

my feewings being hurt

The kakabas are the latest trend of lugabire slippers. They are crafted to be the exact same size of your foot. And when someone makes fun of the size of your foot it means that you are in some way less of a person. You are therefore compelled to turn psychotic and make what is legally tantamount to a criminal threat.

So for those of you who want to make jokes about my kakaba. I am a real man. You’ve been warned.

 

Do you spell satire with the left or the right foot?

……………………………..

In other news, Jennifer Musisi aka The Dark Knightress aka will You Please marry Me when I grow up….

Erique: Boss, good luck with that last one.

F*** off, wama Jenny. For me I feel your stuff. I am into that tough love. If you bring that attitude into our sex life, we shall have a great time. Just don’t take it personal if I bring a bulletproof vest to the bedroom.

Alright legends… i am going in

 

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