Uncle Agony dear,
I think I am cursed. Every time I get a man he falls for my best friends instead. I have stopped having best friends because of this. I have even tried to read books on how to keep a man but it’s not working. Now the men I like go for my workmates or someone close to me. Recently, the man I was dating left me for my younger sister. I am on the verge of committing suicide or becoming a serial killer. Please, please help me!
Your friends are beautiful. But if they loved and respected you, they wouldn’t be beautiful. That’s just selfish of them. If they actually cared about your relationships, they would be ugly. But I totally understand your predicament. It’s never easy to choose between suicide and killing others. Because by committing suicide, you would be thinking only about yourself and not your friends. Which is selfish, like your friends. And you don’t want to be like them.
On the other hand, by killing them, you would be thinking about them, which basically means you’re caring about them. But because they don’t care about you, I see no reason why you should care about them. I say do suicide and don’t be shy about it after. It’s your right.